Sometimes I don’t have enough time to take a long bath. I barely have time to get a quick shower. But it is charming in a way, having to do everything so fast you barely notice you’re wet. And maybe having someone jump into the action, unninvited but never unwelcomed, for a good quickie.

Going on patrol on the Thai jungle can be very dangerous. You have to be on the lookout for sex guerrillas who will stop at nothing to submit their enemies and defile them in unspeakable manners. Sometimes, not even camouflage can do the trick, so a distraction is in order. Click here to see my plan in action.

That wrong turn at Albuquerque must have led me to a Dinosaur-infested area. I’m helpless against those big brutes. I wonder if a strong, muscular caveman would come to my rescue. I’d be willing to go to his cave and thank him properly.